Day 13: Portion control

This morning was the first time since I've started this paleo journey that the scale hasn't gone down more than a half a pound. I'm not gonna lie, it sent me into a little bit of a panic. I realize at some point my body is going to adjust to this way of eating and eventually I'd stop losing weight as quickly as I had been, I just didn't expect it to happen so soon!

I then took a look at my food journal and how I've been eating this past week and I realized the majority of my calories consumed have come from dried fruit and nuts. I know there are a plethora of things I should and can be eating besides dried fruit and nuts, but thus far my paleo cooking has led to catastrophic results and, surprise, surprise, I'm starting to get bored with all of the stuff I can actually cook. So, my go to has been the dietary equivalent of like, 100 squirrels. 100 fat squirrels.

Moderation has never been something I've been good at. When I commit to things, I throw myself in and it's pretty all or nothing from the get go. I leave little room for compromise and little room for adjustment. I also, like everyone else, hate failing. I'd be lying if I didn't admit that this whole paleo situation is pretty far outside my comfort zone--I work in restaurants and they also happen to be the epicenter of the majority of my social interactions. So adopting this mindset has been something that's impacted pretty much every facet of my life.

Honestly, keeping this commitment to myself is slowly becoming less about the outcome, although don't get me wrong I have my eyes on the abdominal prize, and way more about the feasibility of adopting a completely new lifestyle. It sucks to pass up on the awesome steak dinners with co-workers. It blows not being able to grab dinner and drinks with my girlfriends. And I know I could probably go, and I could stick pretty well to the paleo game plan, but there would be compromises made in some way or another, and then I'm falling down a slippery slope. I committed to this at this strict a level for a month, I need to see it through.

There's a lot of stuff happening for me right now, on a personal level, with my relationships, and for the first time in a really long time it feels like a lot of the pieces for an adult version of myself are falling into place. I figure actually taking care of myself should be part of that too. So tomorrow, I'm going to cut back. I made my breakfast and lunch for tomorrow tonight, and I've adjusted my snacking options. I'm only allowing myself like 5 squirrels' worth. It's a little change, but it's still a change. And the paleo beat goes on....